Friday.

After work today, I met up with my friend Alda - who's also a busybee like me haha. :) But I'm so thankful that despite our busy schedules, we still found time to be together. So I shared what I'm going through these past few days... And even if it still pains me, I'm so thankful to have great girlfriends who's always there for me. :) Always ready to listen, even if they don't really know what to say about it. :)

It's been a week since I can't eat properly. Today, we both had Cookies and Cream Frap at a small coffee shop near our place. And shared a pasta. :) Then just talked the night away and she drove me home. :)

And oh, she gave me some gifts which she got me from her Bora trip just this holy week. Soo nice! I'll try to post some pictures if I have time. :)

Countdown: It's been 2days, 9hours, and 34minutes.

Goodnight.

Trust

I'm sorry for the lack of posts. But I've got to say, I miss blogging!! :) So how's everyone? We're now in the third month of the year.

Since the last time I posted, a lot of things happened; for me, at least. My Dad had a problem with hypertension. He was also palpitating. One night, his heartbeat was up to 160/minute! It's so fast it freaks me out. :( And he's scared too. Who won't be? But the problem here is this: he's scared. So it beats fast. I was asking him what he's scared of, and his answer is death. We went to see some doctors but they can't find anything wrong with him. So I came to the conclusion that this is all in the mind. It's the work of the enemy. I kept praying. Even asked some people to pray for my Dad too. It's a long process.. But I don't have the time and energy now to go into all the details. I just want to share that it's been 8 days and counting since my Dad is perfectly okay! :) Praise! Thank You Lord. :)

I'm so grateful. But I tell you, when you're there, it's really so hard. You feel so helpless because you know you can't do anything. Then there's this voice in my heart that says, Trust Me. So that's just what I did. I invite you to trust too, my friend. When I see people, it makes me think what's behind every smile. What they're going through. My prayer tonight is that may each one of us learn to trust the one who loved us long before we existed. The one who called us by name. And the one who died for us. :)

Goodnight. May you all have a fruitful week ahead. :)

Lately...

Hello! :) It's been a busy December and there's still a lot needed to be done as this year comes to an end.

Here's some pictures from the past few weeks. :)

My parents just celebrated their anniversary. :)

This is what I love most about the holidays - shopping! :) For family and friends and for myself. Ha! I love bazaars and all the rush. :)

I'm so thankful for having a brother who's kind enough to drive for me too. :)

Currently loving Gigi's Cheese Custaroons and Poppers. :)

This Christmas tree is so big I love it! :) Found it beside the Rockwell Tent.

***

On other news, if you follow my blog, you'd know that my relationship with my granny are not so smooth. Actually it's not only me. Her relationship with everybody is not okay. And I don't know what's happening except that it's getting worse. She keeps on yelling and nagging to get things done. I can't work well in the office because of her. I can't sleep well at night because she sleeps after work, and when it's really time to go to bed, that's the time she'd wake up and start doing stuffs that's annoyingly noisy that'd keep you up the whole night. :( Is it just because she's getting older? Her choice of words and the tone she uses is totally different. And this just frustrates me. And my whole family as well. :( Sometimes I wanna answer back and walk away but I didn't because I know that it's wrong. :(

Anyway... What did you plan for your vacation? :) My cousins are going to Japan, others are going to Singapore and Malaysia. While I'm stuck here in Manila. Haha! I wish I could go with them and take a vacation too. :) So as usual, I'm attending our church's Youth Conference this Sunday-Wednesday. And we also have the yearly Praise Festival for Sunday School when I get back. :)

This morning we went to visit my maternal grandparents. :) And it's so traffic outside it took us two hours to get to their place! O.o I'm home blogging and waiting for PLDT people to come and put up another phone line. So I guess that's all for now! :)

6 days to go till Christmas!! :)

Oh October!

Hi all! :) it's October already. can you believe it? :) i woke up to a rainy Friday morning and im loving the weather. it makes me want to stay under the sheets all day. :) but i can't. boo. haha. im still home today, because we are repainting our house, and changing the outlets. :) so it's messy here. i can't wait to see the whole thing done. :) we've moved here 13 years ago and it's great to make a few changes now. :) i also think it's the perfect timing since my grandmother went abroad with her sisters for two weeks. :)

Did you notice anything new? yes, i changed the layout of my blog. :) time for some changes right? :) im pretty satisfied with this one compared to the old one. how about you?

Sorry for being quiet here. been too busy with work, work, work, and church stuffs. but you know that i always update whenever i have time right? :) i still got some things done, like finishing Nicholas Sparks' latest book - Safe Haven. :) have you read it? it's beautiful! as always. :) i recommend you to read it, it won't disappoint. :)

I also joined the career outing with some churchmates at Grande Island Resort in Subic. :) it was a fun trip, even if i almost puked while we were riding the boat to get to the other island. i love my room mates, especially Grace. of course. :)

And last but not the least, i finally found the time to renew my passport already! haha. :)

Till here friends! have a great month ahead! :)

No matter how busy you get, you make time for what you choose to have in your life. ♥

unfortunate events.

last night, grace and i went to visit a gospel friend. im glad that they agreed to go to interview with us and be baptized on Sunday morning. when we were about to leave, the mom was so furious and yelled at us. questioning what we were doing to her daughters, and told us eversince we invited them to go to church, they changed. that they became disrespectful, self-centered and all. it lasted for about ten minutes and we just kept silent. shocked maybe? but there's nothing to say really. because she won't understand us either.

***

this afternoon, i went to the drugstore to buy something, then i saw this scary-looking man looking at me. and he was paying attention to my every move. so i looked back at him as if saying "what!?". i waited for him and his two friends to finish paying for what they bought and leave the drugstore. i waited for sometime to make sure they won't return. i stepped out, looked around and the coast is clear, but as i reached the corner, i saw the three of them again, looking around to see if there were people and back at me. it's so creepy! so i turned around and thankfully saw a Baranggay Tanod, i told him to please cross the street with me because the guys were really scary and i think they wanted to holdup me. it's embarrassing, feels like im a 6year old girl again, but it really scared me. :( *sigh*

***

what a day.

im tired.

im tired of the never-ending things needed to be done.

im tired of the noise at home.

im tired of being angry at people not being considerate of others' feelings.

im tired of thinking.

im tired of not being able to get answers.

im tired of the ups.

im tired of the downs.

im tired of the rollercoaster.

and i just want off.

because im tired.

This (Not So Good) Week

this is what surprised me Tuesday night. my grandmother beside one of the cabinets that housed some of my things. i asked her what she was doing and she was just so furious. this then led to unpleasant conversations and yelling that left me crying all night. i didn't answered back anymore because i know it will only make things worse than they already are. she's really not herself and i just don't understand her anymore.

and here comes Basyang (the typhoon). the wind howled all night and lights were out. and it was a really sad sad night. one of the saddest i can remember and it feels like im so lost.

***

fast forward to today. Sunday. the grownups went to a party during lunch, so i, together with my brother and two cousins, went to the mall to pick up a book i pre-ordered at Powerbooks. :)

got it! :) Crazy Love by Francis Chan. :) i got many books now waiting to be read. hmmm.. it's all goood. :)

we stopped by Cerealicious to snack and rest for awhile.

About A-hoy : coco pops, chips ahoy, choco kisses

Pirates of the Cadbury-ean : koko duo, cadbury zip, oreo

Jumango : cornflakes, mango, honey crumble

it was gloomy and raining on our way home and it reminded me again of what these past few days had brought me. *sigh*

***

thanks to Joy for the pictures. :)

yup, she also took the first picture. ;)

Happy Monday

today, i got two things that made my Monday a happy one. :)

Books

my much awaited books! :) Plan B by Pete Wilson, I Will Carry You by Angie Smith (yeah i bought two!!), and The One Year Book of Hope by Nancy Guthrie. i was really looking forward to reading these books. thanks Candy! :)

Starbuck's To Go Strap

while wrapping my new books and eating Yellow Cab's pizza, my Dad came home and gave me this cute cellphone strap from Starbucks. that's sweet of him. :)

***

lately, im struggling on how to deal with my grandmother. she started to change two weeks ago. she suddenly becomes so full of energy that she wants to get involved in everything. she cleans eveything she could get her hands on, she threw away some things that meant so much to me, she emptied our pantry, she opens my cabinet, she comments on my clothes, my things, on how i do things. actually, she's not only like that to me, she's like that almost towards everybody. it seems like there's always something (bad) to say all the time. and it seems like i don't know her anymore. it just makes me sad and frustrated. :( i work with her, i live with her, and i share the same room with her. and im really sad because i can't do anything about it. i just want to have her old self back. :(

and so... im always sad, whether i go to work or come home. either way, im still with her. it's not that i don't want to be with her, it's just that i don't want what's happening between us. it makes me want to get away for awhile. to breathe. :(

anyways, i think it's time to hit the sack. early tomorrow! i hope tomorrow will be a good day. goodnight folks. :)

Hello July

hello all. it's a new month once again. we're now on the 7th month of 2010. :)

yesterday, i had a training for Sunday School early in the morning. after that, i tutored then went back to work. we're still open even during holidays.

we now have a new president too. :) i hope Aquino will do better than Arroyo.

last night, i attended our practice for Sunday. our song - Who Am I. if ever, it will be our first time to sing it. but our practice didn't go well. :( im trying to find an easier piano piece, then i got a text that our songs will be changed already.

im still at home now. because we have a new maid, so i have to show her around. i'll be back at work after lunch. :)

so there, just popped in to do a quick post. :) now i'll go back to cleaning my book shelf. :)

***

inside the Safari Jeep @Zoobic :)

This week - In a Glance

Sunday: i went to World Trade with Aileen and Hans for the food expo. :) bought some goodies too.

:korean dinner at Maru. :)

Monday: i was surprised to see my cousin Sherlock who came to my office to visit. he's all grown up now! he's taller. im older. haha. heard some news about our guakong and guama (maternal grandparents), who sold their business already and finally retired. livin' the good life :)

:made mashed potatoes tonight and played UNO cards! :)

Tuesday: i finally got my yearbook! :) my college yearbook is here, but my high school yearbook is nowhere to be found. seeing my name and picture there reminds me of one thing - im getting old! my school days are over. but it will always hold a special place in my heart. :)

Wednesday: attended an orientation for Hannah at St.Stephens.

:my cousin Joy got herself a DSLR for her photography class at school. :)

Thursday: Manila Day! :) watched Toy Story 3 with my cousins and Erwin. :)

Friday: lovin' Kaspersky. :) i bought an anti virus for my computer because i need it badly. viruses are everywhere and the old one i have isn't able to detect and delete it properly. so im glad to have this, even though it's a little bit pricey for me since i always use the free ones i get to download from the net.

:this afternoon, i was given a chance to share in our Gospel Meeting at church, together with Koo. :) im so scared up until the last minute i feel like im going to puke. but the Lord was there the entire meeting and im thankful that He carried us through. :)

:rained so hard! i love it! :)

Saturday: after tutoring and picking up the groceries, i went to see Alda. :) it's been so long since we last saw each other! :)

:lunch with Dustin. :) then he went back to work and i just watched DVD at home - Forrest Gump. :) loved the silence and privacy i had even for a short while. :) sometimes, it's good to be alone too. :)

:tonight, i got some news and i don't know what to feel about it. i know i should be happy, but im really scared because i know what im capable of, and i think i can't make it. please pray for me. :) thanks!

and for TOMORROW:

Happy sweet 27th to my dear friend CANDY! :)

i love you, you know i do. thanks for all! :)

Today...

A Love For Books

i didn't have had a great day today. many things / people / events made me sad and disappointed. but there are still some things that made my day -

1) finally having a copy of Angie's book I Will Carry You

2) my brother Hans surprising me with Nicholas Sparks' A Walk To Remember

3) seeing my brother Mark again after three long weeks

4) thank God it's Friday :)

i love my little brothers. :) no matter what happens, at the end of the day, i know i always have my family. and that's more than enough. :) Mark and my stepmom went for a three week vacation to US. and as a present, i asked them to buy me Angie's book because it's not available here. im glad they found it. :)

i've read all of Sparks' novels, but i don't have my own copy of The Notebook and A Walk To Remember. and tonight after visitation, i got one. last one left. i'll buy the other one soon so i can complete my collection already. :)

im excited to start reading my new books. :) maybe tomorrow. i hope it'll rain. then i'll stay at home, read my books, with a cup of hot chocolate with lots of marshmallows. wow. i love that. :) tomorrow! i'll sleep now, because my head hurts. goodnight everyone! :)

may we all have a happy weekend and a happy June ahead! :)

05. 10. 10

"A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep. In dreams, you will lose your heartaches. Whatever you wish for, you keep. Have faith in your dreams and someday, your rainbow will come smiling through. No matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing, the dreams that you wish will come true." -Cinderella ♥

***

did you went out and vote today? :) did you vote wisely? i didn't vote. haha. honestly, i don't know who to vote either. let's see who wins. :)

my auntie was discharged from the hospital this afternoon. thank God. :) and i stayed with her the whole day. :) the weather is still HOT. so i took my time showering when i came home. love it!! :) it's nice to stay home and do nothing once in awhile. :)

while checking my facebook account, i received a message from my Sunday School student. it says: "this is my piano lesson teacher debbie" and attached a video of him playing the piano. it's so cute :) and im touched by his sweet gesture. :)

kids.. they always know how to make you smile. it's the little things that we often overlook. :)

***

May is a busy month for me. looking forward to June!! ;)

DDL

my laptop crashed yesterday

and it's dead as of the moment.

and im really sad about it. :(

but there's something to be happy about today.

even if work and the heat makes me feel exhausted.

let's look at the brighter side.

it's Dustin's birthday! :)

Happy Birthday Dus!! :)

i wish you happiness, love, and good health always. :)

untitled.

im tired.

i don't know why i feel tired these past few... months. i miss being a student. where there are always holidays and breaks to look forward to. but when you're working, you work and work. there's no summer nor sem break. boo! in a nutshell, my life is this: work, tutor (work), eat, and church. in between, of course i also eat and sleep. and sometimes like tonight, i find time to blog. it's not that i don't love/like what im doing. it's just that i want to have a break. or else, i think ill burnout. :( really. i want to get away for awhile. when i was younger, travelling was hard because my Dad is always worried about me. but im a grownup now. when i tell my Dad my reasons, im sure he'll let me. :) i know, coz i tried. ;) i just want to get away from the city.. from the noise.. the pollution.. the computer. away from it all. just pure rest. :) who wants to go too? :) anywhere will do. but i have some local places in mind like Bohol, Ilocos, and Amanpulo! the last one is definitely impossible. hahaha! ;) for now, at least. :)

*change topic*

im craving for onion rings and Beard Papa creampuffs today. weird, i never craved for onion rings. haha. anyway, i just love to eat. eat. eat. :) and sleep. sleep. sleep. :O) it rained today! i loved it! :) okay, i know im so random. ill sign off now, prayer meeting tonight. bye!! :)

Summer Conference 2010

off we go

last Wednesday, we left for Clark along with a lot of brothers and sisters who came from different places. the theme for this year's conference is Knowing Christ More. we had a stopover halfway to eat our lunch. :)

after morning devotion with Pau, Victoria, and Grace

Pau, Cathy, and RJ stayed with me in one room. Grace and others beside ours. :)

here's Baby Simon David. Michelle's baby :) he's sleeping soundly here and looks just like his brother Ethan. :)

break time :)

there's nowhere to go during break time except in our rooms. sometimes we sleep, shower, but often, we just talk. :) sometimes the silence, especially during mornings, is almost deafening. but i treasure it because for a short time, im able to have some quiet time away from the noise and pollution of the city. :)

after small group :)

Nancy and baby Katriel :)

during our last night, after i came back from Holiday Inn and after Grace's practice, we went to see Nancy and her baby girl. :) she's so cute with her rosy cheeks, only to find out that it was actually rashes. haha. ;)

the conference was abundant and beautiful. :) and im so grateful to be able to join. the messages shared by speakers were enlightening. :) the songs One Desire and Here I Am To Worship really touched my heart. :) the Lord spoke to me in many ways. and during prayer time in the breaking of bread meeting, i was once again reminded of His love for me. somehow in my heart the Lord is telling me that it is not the nails that held Him on the cross, but it was love. :) can we find another who can love us like that? someone who we leave and reject again and again but would still not give up on us? no one can. only Jesus. :)

may we live a life worthy of the calling. :)

graduation.

i woke up early today to attend my brother's graduation at Hope. :) we came an hour earlier and we were able to choose a good seat. it was good to see old faces of my teachers before. five years ago, i also walked in the same chapel, which is now called Hope Theater Hall. :) they renovated it and it's so different from the one we used before. it's better, more improved and equipped now. :)

we had a family picture before the program started. here's my step mom. i think this is the first time i'll be posting a picture with her in it. we're not really close, but we're civil. :) she's nice though. i think im just used to without a mom. ;)

here's Papa and Hans. :) my brother is taller than my Dad now. haha. ;)

and here i am with my little brothers. :) i love them!! and i'd do anything for them. :) the program started at 9am. the honor students entered first, then each class marched in led by their respective advisers. Hans' adviser is Mrs. Carreon, which was also my adviser when i was graduating. :) we sang the national anthem and school song. some students delivered their speech. but the part i liked most aside from when Hans went up the stage was the encouraging message delivered by a guest speaker, Ms. Belen Lim. she's a very successful woman, but all these success only made her humble. and it made me admire her for that. she shared her experiences when she was a student, the lessons she learned throughout her 30 years in the banking industry, and her turning point during a church camp. :)

speaking of camps, we're off tomorrow to Pampanga. and we'll be back on Sunday afternoon. i know that God will work in this conference. i pray for revival and restoration. just like a line in a song says, "Our heart, our desire, is to see the nations worship.." . nothing is worth more than giving your life to the Lord. :) even though i have a lot of failures, i know that i'll always be going back to the Lord. because of His unfailing love. :) we may be hard, put a wall around our heart for fear of being rejected and hurt again, but trust me, open your heart to Him, give Him all the pieces, and He'll mend it for us. :)

have a happy Holy Week everyone! :) share soon when i get a chance. :)

TGIF

hello friends! :) so sleeeeeepy today. but im happy it's Friday already. :) in less than a week, i'll be in Pampanga attending our annual summer conference. i can't imagine it's so near already. anyway.. here are some pictures of what has been going on in the past few days.. aside from work. :)

Hannah already graduated from kindergarten. :) with honors in both English and Chinese class. im proud of her. :) next year, she'll be in grade one already. :)

last Tuesday, this beautiful girl turned 10. :) im happy to see her grow into a sweet, young lady. :) we celebrated her birthday at Korean Village in Malate. yum foods! i loved their ice cream too that i bought some and brought it home. :) twas a great night with family. :)

yesterday, Joy, Grace, and i went to visit Faith and her baby boy - Zion, who's one week old today. :) he's so tiny and red. babies indeed are adorable. :)

here's my Dad and i. :) taken in Fort while strolling around the new Burgos Circle. we had a nice dinner in Cafe Juanita then capped our meal with desserts in UCC. :) sorry for the quality of the picture, it was taken only with a phone cam. ;)

and last but not the least, here's what keeps me busy lately.. Plants vs. Zombies!! haha. do you play it too? i saw my cousins play a couple of times before. even my brother plays it. and out of curiosity, i tried, and well, i got hooked. :) it's a fun game and i love it. :)

that's all for now. im running late for our visitation. :) bye! hope to update soon. :)

getting my thoughts out

So here i go...

spent three days at the Sanctuarium with my cousins. visitors are few during daytime. so we spend time talking about just anything. time is fast when you're there. i wonder why. when people come, the same stories are told, same questions answered.

on Sunday afternoon at 2pm, we left Sanctuarium and headed to Manila Memorial Park in Dasmarinas, Cavite for the burial. we walked twice. family and friends walked alongside our family. and i saw just how everyone's support comforted the family. the service was quick, and was done within an hour.

these past few days, im spending time with Aileen. we are finding some important documents at their home that are necessary to transact some things like cancelling credit cards, paying bills and transferring of funds.

yesterday, my Dad was rushed to the emergency room because of hypertension. his blood pressure went up to 180!! =( i was so afraid and im not even home to go to the hospital right away. i felt so helpless and terrified. =( my brother was with him, and after 1 hour, the doctor sent him home and gave him meds and advised him to rest. can you do me a favor? please pray for him. thanks.

it's so HOT!! the dams are drying up, power running out which results to rotating brownouts, and plants are dying too. i can't imagine that it's been three months without rain! while it's still snowing on some parts of the globe. earthquakes are everywhere too. i receive news via text everyday and hear about earthquakes. you probably heard about the 8.8 magnitude quake at Chile last Saturday. it's scary. it's stronger than the one in Haiti. but both brought great damage. when that happens here, im sure buildings will collapse right away. *sigh* the end is really near. i don't think we still have 20 more years. 10 maybe? or 5? well, who can tell. nobody knows.

guess i'll stop here. i'll lie down and rest for awhile before going to church for the prayer meeting tonight. it's been awhile too.

thanks for your time, friends. :)

So Sudden.

on my way home Tuesday afternoon, i got a call that my auntie will not be able to come to our house because her husband, Uncle Wilson, is so sick and they need to bring him to the hospital. but we didn't know that it was so serious.

when we arrived the emergency room of UDMC (because it's the nearest hospital from their home), i saw many doctors and nurses surrounding his bed. IVs dripping.. giving him oxygen to help him breathe.. and many other wires that i don't know what for. he went in for a CT scan, and when the result came, the doctor said that a vein was ruptured, and the blood spread all throughout his brain. the place cannot be operated. and there's no way he can make it. =( he was transferred to the ICU and stayed there during the night.

the next morning, my cousin Aileen went to stay with him. the hospital doesn't allow anyone even relatives to stay in the ICU unless it's during the visiting hours. so she stayed at the waiting area. then the nurse came out and informed her that her dad's heartbeat is so fast and has fever at 42C!! it's the first time i heard someone with a temp so high! we later earned that the vein that was ruptured is the one in control of the body temperature. after awhile, the doctor said that the patient is unstable again. they tried to resuscitate him for 45minutes but the line in the monitor remains flat. he breathed his last, then he's gone. at 54years old. =( i wasn't there when it happened. only my cousin, her mom, my dad, and Uncle Ramon.

it's all so sudden. he didn't made it even for a day. =( he has highblood.. maybe that's why the vein ruptured. he also survived two strokes before.

we are not close personally, but i also have some good memories with him. he loves plants and animals. when you go to their house, there's dogs, birds, fishes, hamsters, rabbits, and a snake. it's like a mini zoo. ;) in their rooftop, you'll find different kind of plants and many orchids. :) im sad. but my heart really breaks for my Auntie Alice and my cousins. especially Aileen. =( we stayed at Sanctuarium last night and while she was telling me what happened in the hospital and some memories of her dad, tears were flowing and my heart broke into pieces. =( i love her so much and it's sad that i can't do anything that would lessen her pain. =(

today.. im blogging from Sanctuarium since there's free wifi and no visitors are around. i arrived this morning with my cousin Joy along with Erwin. i think we'll stay here till tonight. and they will be sleeping in our house. please pray for them. especially during this time.. when our words can't really do anything. but i believe that God is able to give them peace and comfort.

thanks.